# Embody Your Power Podcast - Episode 27 Love Is The Answer
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[00:00:02] hi I'm Danielle Karen and in this podcast I'm going to share with you knowledge and tools that I believe should be accessible to everyone they're fundamental and essential to Being Human embody your power is an integrative model that Bridges science spirituality and ancient wisdom to give you the resources needed to live your fullest potential as a psychotherapist for over 16 years and now as a coach I help people know reclaim and embody their power on all levels it's my mission to help you connect to your unshakable resilience to know true power and freedom to be Sovereign and to remember your divine nature if you're wanting to learn tools to release layers of conditioning heal from trauma feel at home in your body have inner peace expand your capacity for Joy connect spiritually and take a

[00:01:06] journey with me to embody your power then this podcast is for you thank you for joining me together let's raise our Consciousness to help evolve [Music] Humanity Love Is Fundamental and essential to Awakening Consciousness love is the highest vibration and the purest form of Consciousness that we can experience in this season I'm exploring how internal family systems or ifs for short and parts work can help make Universal spiritual truths more tangible to experience and embody starting with love let's take a moment to contemplate this quote from one of my favorite spiritual teachers Matt Con there will never be a time when love isn't the answer there will never be a moment when

[00:02:08] love isn't needed or when you've given too much love another way to engage with this quote is to ask ourselves in any situation is there more love I can give myself or another the good news is that you are already love your core self is love it's not something you have to build up or make stronger it's a matter of discovering what's already there by peeling away the layers that have been covering it as roomie said your task is not to seek for love but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it in this episode we'll explore how to release the barriers we have to knowing and experiencing our true nature as love using ifs and parts work let's take a look at what David Hawkins discovered in his research that culminated in his book power versus

[00:03:11] Force Through extensive research and experiments using applied Kinesiology Hawkins claimed to access a universal field of knowledge enabling him to calibrate levels of Truth and Consciousness from 1 to a thousand he combined these results with his knowledge from Clinical Psychiatry philosophy and spiritual study aiming to create a comprehensive framework that outlines the energetic differences between states like shame anger love and Enlightenment suggesting that these levels impact personal and societal outcomes in his book Hawkins distinguishes between force which he describes as lower vibrational States like anger pride and fear and power as higher States like love joy and peace love as a form of power does not seek to control or manipulate instead it empowers others and contributes to the

[00:04:16] harmonious flow of life let me repeat that love empowers others and contributes to the harmonious flow of Life Force by contrast is associated with coercion and conflict according to the book love has a transformative effect on the individual and the world it elevates Consciousness heals wounds and creates an environment where growth and peace can flourish love is a critical turning point in a person's spiritual journey marking the shift from ego-based living to a more expansive and enlightened perspective Hawkins defines love as a state of consciousness that transcends the ego or our parts and connects individuals with higher truth and unity or core self Hawkins highlights unconditional love as a state where there are no conditions judgments or expectations attached to loving

[00:05:19] others this kind of love is associated with understanding compassion and acceptance aligning with higher spiritual truths our core self is unconditionally loving and it doesn't have expectations or an agenda we can see that it doesn't jump in and save us it loves our parts on the Journey of Awakening David Hawkins shares in this quote love is misunderstood to be an emotion actually it is a state of awareness a way of being in the world a way of seeing oneself and others love is not what you do love is what you are love can be understood as the fundamental force of creation and the most powerful energy in the universe love is the essence of unity Harmony and alignment with the natural flow of life when we act out of love we align ourselves with the natural order of the universe and become co-creators with it

[00:06:24] love is the path to Unity and connection with others the planet and the cosmos love transcends the ego and separation and is through love that we can experience Oneness with everything around us Ram do a psychologist and spiritual teacher often emphasized that pure Consciousness is synonimous with unconditional love when one is fully in touch with their true Consciousness they naturally express love compassion and kindness towards others ramdas beli living from a place of pure Consciousness means acting from love in all situations recognizing the Divine in everyone and everything the type of Love he's referring to is not personal or possessive but is a natural expression of our core self expressing compassion and love towards our s and others is a way to align with this higher

[00:07:28] Consciousness I love hearing ramdas share the story about his Guru maharaji who was said to have embodied and lived in a state of pure unconditional love maharaji would say things to ramdas that no one could have known unless maharaji was able to read his mind and ramdas was convinced that maharaji did indeed have the ability to know all of his thoughts and then ramdas would joke that he didn't always have the purest thoughts so what was really touching to R do is that despite sitting across from someone who knew everything about him maharaji loved him unconditionally this changed Ram das's understanding of Love completely he realized that we are not loved for what we do or don't do we are love itself he spent the rest of his life teaching that loving others is not just about seeing their personality their ego or their parts but recognizing the divine within them their poor self this awareness of love as our

[00:08:33] Essence can Inspire us to see and love others Beyond The Masks they we I'm going to be quoting a lot from Matt KH in this episode as he speaks and writes a lot about love he's the author of many books including whatever arises love that according to what Matt Khan teaches we evolve our Consciousness by becoming more loving toward ourselves and others our highest priority is loving ourselves because as we love ourselves we expand our capacity to truly and Unconditionally Love others He suggests that when we respect ourselves we hear our intuition and follow it Matt Con also emphasizes that when we love ourselves we respect ourselves as a unique expression of the Divine and nothing less I love that imagine what a world would look like if we all respected ourselves as a unique expression of the Divine and nothing less next let's look at how ifs and

[00:09:39] parts work supports Us in accessing and embodying the love that we are first ifs helps us know and experience our core self which is consciousness and unconditional love and I believe it to be Eternal we can see the core self as the spirit guide to the mind which includes the parts and ego and Body on this journey the core self is like the sun it's always shining it's already awake and knows the truth about who we are it's here to guide the parts on their journey to awaken into their true nature ifs helps us know our core self by identifying as roomie said the barriers or parts that block it from shining through through ifs we have very practical ways of working with these parts so that we can live from our core self there are two types of Parts Exiles and protectors that get in our way of accessing our core self and

[00:10:42] love what happens is that these parts get cut off from the core self and start operating without knowing about or trusting the core self imagine the core self is like the bus driver supporting and guiding all the children on their journey to Earth school but the kids didn't know there was a bus driver or for some reason didn't think the bus driver was competent and so the kids took over and started jumping into the driver's seat when our parts don't know about the core self they suffer because they're cut off from their main source of Love support guidance and nourishment without access to their own love they're in a state of anxiety Panic fear and stress when protector Parts don't trust the for self they're in fear they're afraid that if they didn't work hard at their job then we would get hurt or experience some type of pain Exiles are the parts that get locked away relieving the pain of the past all

[00:11:44] alone imagine being stuck in a painful memory or belief for years or decades and not having any contact with the love and support of the core self which is exactly what is needed to heal and be free since the protectors and Exiles either don't know about the core self or don't trust it they're like children who believe they were abandoned by their loving parents so they end up jumping in the driver's seat and driving us around motivated by their pain and fear let's take a look at how protector Parts more specifically play a role in our ability to access our core self common examples of protectors include anxiety depression anger people pleasing perfectionism being intellectual avoidant having guilt the common inner critic or judge and addict Parts when the protector Parts take over it's because they don't want us to get

[00:12:47] hurt or experience pain and they jump in to make sure this doesn't happen when this is the case they're cut off from nourishment of the core self it's kind of like a child not knowing they have parents and so they're burdened with all the tasks of taking care of themselves imagine a child having to figure out how to take care of a house feed themselves get themselves to school and live their life all by themselves because no one is around to help sounds like a disaster right our protector parts are in the same position given they don't know about the core self they work overtime to try their best to protect us this is why we have parts that feel like they they've been working 24/7 and never have a break the protector parts are loyal to us and they don't want us to get hurt however the way they go about it is often not helpful and can create more pain let's take an addict part for example whether we're experiencing an addiction to a

[00:13:48] substance shopping games sex food or anything else this kind of part may be wanting to do these things to try to avoid feeling some kind of emot pain however it can often result in US feeling shame when the protector Parts take over they often do things that we're not proud of and therefore it can make it harder for us to have love and compassion for ourselves it's like digging ourselves deeper into a hole often these protector Parts want to protect us from some pain and actually cause a similar pain in the process for example many protect s would rather us criticize ourselves to avoid the pain of someone else criticizing us the logic of the parts is if I feel good about myself and someone comes along and judges or criticizes me I could feel caught off guard I could go from feeling good to bad or I could doubt myself for feeling good about

[00:14:49] myself but if I'm already judging and criticizing myself and I'm already feeling bad about myself then when someone else judges or criticizes me then it won't really hurt because I've already put myself in that position this is a good example of how many protectors operate keep in mind the main thing that they don't want you to feel is emotional pain however they can cause a tremendous amount of emotional Pain by criticizing us constantly to be prepared for any criticism that can come our way in the future this is similar to protective parts that will do anything to prevent us us from feeling happy hopeful elated or excited sounds a little strange right but it's very common I see it all the time it's like it's too risky to feel happy and elated there are protector parts that don't want us to experience the pain Despair and disappointment when that feeling ultimately

[00:15:51] shifts it's an illusion to think that we can control the nature of change and impermanence but these types of protectors can often keep us feeling numb flat doubtful hopeless or apathetic so that we don't have ups and downs in order to accomplish this though they have to Cloud out our core self now let's take a look at how Exile Parts can specifically play a role in our ability to access love and our core self when the Exile part takes over we end up feeling consumed by their emotional pain part of their wisdom is to flood us with their intense emotional pain in order to try to get our attention so that they can heal common feelings of Exiles include feeling ashamed rejected alone powerless wrong and not good enough they also carry burdens that can show up as internalized beliefs or messages about ourselves that aren't

[00:16:55] true for example I'm unlovable I'm not worthy of good things in life I'm damaged I'm selfish and I can't trust myself we often internalize these messages based on how others have treated us when we've had experiences where we didn't feel loved then it can create a challenge for some parts to trust and accept the love of the core self ifs helps us identify and heal these burdens that our parts carry let's zoom in on the burden of believing we're selfish or being called Selfish as this is very common for some people it's one of the worst things someone can say about them when someone calls a child selfish they can interpret that in many different ways for example they might think it's not okay to think of myself first or take care of myself or receive something nice for myself

[00:17:59] or have the center of attention or truly enjoy something that they like people who are concerned about being seen as selfish by others are usually not selfish and benefit from working with the parts that are preventing them from fully embodying and expressing themselves sometimes when we're hurt or abused by narcissists a part of us vows never to be selfish because we know what kind of pain can come from that but there's no Nuance in that decision the parts can actually go to The Other Extreme of being selfless this type of Burden can also be passed down through families and cultures who believed it's not okay to be selfish and can create an inner conflict where we feel ashamed threatened or abandoned for loving and taking care of ourselves somehow this type of Burden confuses selfishness with loving ourselves and that we're loving ourselves we're not being thoughtful of

[00:19:01] others or even harming them so if you have Parts carrying a burden around selfishness it's important to work with them so that you can have greater access to your own inate love this is an important cultural burden to call attention to because as Matt KH exclaims loving yourself will always be of the highest importance the more loving we become we evolve our consciousness another way that our burdened parts can create challenges around self-love is the fact that their main emotions are pain and fear fear can be seen as the opposite of love and that's the main emotion of the protector Parts again they're afraid if they don't do their job you would get hurt or experience some type of pain the pain of our Exiles energizes The Protector parts to take over and try to do anything they can to prevent this pain from being felt in addition if we're overwhelmed by the pain of our parts we can have a hard

[00:20:06] time feeling love for ourselves because we don't have access to our core self in those moments the fears and the needs of our parts all come from a need to survive we could say that we are both animal and divine with our animal nature completely motivated by survival while the Divine is not our body the vehicle for the journey and our parts on the Journey of Awakening are driven by survival our DNA is wired for survival our core self on the other hand is the divine within and the guide to our parts on the journey it's not orienting from survival the core self as dick Schwarz says is whole indestructible and cannot be damaged if you knew you were indestructible would you be concerned about survival that's my understanding of why the core self doesn't intervene and save you from experiencing something painful

[00:21:09] it knows the truth about you the core self holds a much much much bigger and different perspective and guides the parts and the body lovingly on the journey when we're in a state of survival we're wired to look out for our own needs first we can have parts that look like their intention is to benefit others when in reality it's trying to save itself for example a people pleasing part on the outside could look like we're concerned with other people's feelings but it really comes back to how we would feel if we didn't please others which is commonly feelings like shame rejection or abandonment Awakening Consciousness is moving beyond living from The Limited experiences of of our parts that are survival oriented to living from our core self which is love the core self is supporting our parts in knowing and experiencing ourselves as the Divinity that we are in turn the core self gets

[00:22:13] to experience embodied Consciousness when our parts are separated from the core self their source of Love they suffer what can happen then is that the parts can jump in the driver's seat and drive us around looking for love from other people in this scenario your core self has been hijacked by the parts and therefore the version of you trying to receive love from others is a part that is motivated by pain or fear what are the odds that this part is going to attract or meet up with a person that will actually give them the kind of love that they're looking for actually it can be quite the setup to enter into a relationship from a part needy for love versus from our core self that is love essentially we have a part that has lost contact with its main source of love looking for love from someone else what we want to do is identify these parts and work with them and help

[00:23:17] them feel loved by the core self then our core self can be in the driver's seat when entering into a relationship when we do this work we create a secure attachment internally between our parts and our core self which ripples out to how we engage in our relationships with others how do our parts feel when they're loved by our core self if you've experienced ifs or parts work then you've most likely experienced how profound it is for our parts to receive the love of the core self every day I see people completely change in front of me when they access this love Within thems elves the love of the core self is so powerful that it can heal our parts and sometimes instantly so how do we become more loving toward ourselves first we need to know that there are two aspects of ourselves there's our parts who are on the Journey of Awakening and there's our core self that is already awake when our parts get

[00:24:22] cut off from their source of Love they struggle with feeling love for themselves and other parts and essentially other people if you would like to learn the step-by-step process on how to do this work I'd recommend listening to my podcast starting with episode number one and going consecutively through to episode 20 as it's designed to be a mini course specifically episodes 5 through 11 will give you instructions to work with your parts and access your course self to summarize the steps briefly we we want to recognize and identify our parts we want to start to see different aspects of our mind as different parts of ourself for example when we feel anxious we want to see it as a part and realize that it's not all of who we are then we want to learn how to separate from all of our parts and get to know who we are when all our parts give us some

[00:25:23] space I recommend taking some time to get to know the qualities of the core self that that arise sometimes the only thing we might feel at first is a sense of emptiness and that's okay if that happens I encourage you to stay curious and give it some time as the core self will emerge it can be helpful to imagine pausing the parts to deepen into understanding our core self as pure Consciousness pure love then we can bring this loving Consciousness to the parts which is exactly what they've been waiting for the love of our core self is the nourishment that can bring about profound internal healing health and Harmony which supports all of our external relationships as well I once heard Matt Khan suggest that we only speak to ourself and others as we would a young child this is essentially what we're doing in ifs we're learning to speak to our parts in

[00:26:26] a loving and compassionate way if we speak to them with aggression judgment fear or annoyance they react accordingly and they know that your core self isn't the one who's interacting with them so there's no fooling the parts when we interact with our parts from our core self we see very positive results through the love and support of the core self our parts can feel seen and heard relax heal unburden integrate past experiences reclaim their power experience inner peace and ultimately awaken into their true nature what happens if we don't do the work to heal our parts with our loving conscious core self the parts that we don't love in ourselves are often the same parts we judge in others here's another way to think about that what we judge in others is what we haven't loved and accepted in ourselves

[00:27:30] in order to be more loving toward others we have to love ourselves more often other people's Parts aren't so easy to love and have compassion for because we have parts that react with pain and fear judgments that we have of others are ways to identify our unhealed parts within ourselves the origin of our judgments reside within us another one of my favorite spiritual teachers on my path Byron Katie is the author of loving what is and she's best known for her method of self-inquiry called the work this simple yet profound process involves questioning stressful thoughts and judgments to reveal deeper truths leading to Inner Peace and healing her teachings emphasize that our judgments of others are projections of Our Own unhealed Parts and by turning inward and questioning our thoughts we can free ourselves from suffering and

[00:28:33] transform our perception of reality Byron Katie is known to say it's not your job to like me it's mine when we judge someone it may reveal that we have not fully accepted or loved ourselves she suggests we look at our judgments to uncover where we need to offer ourselves love Byron Katie makes another powerful point when she says we never hate people we only hate what we imagine about them she suggests that our judgments of others are based on stories we create about them and these stories often reflect our fears insecurities and unhealed emotions if we inquire into why we see someone in a certain way we begin to see the reflection of our own mental patterns she emphasizes that when we resist or judge reality we are actually in conflict with ourselves our judgments of others are

[00:29:36] opportunities to inquire into where we're resisting acceptance and healing within Carl Young's concept of the Shadow aligns deeply with the idea that what we judge in others reflects parts of ourselves we haven't fully integrated dick Schwarz uses the term tormentors to refer to people people who activate our parts tormentors serve as mirrors reflecting back aspects of ourselves that are wounded defensive or in need of healing through these difficult relationships we have opportunities to see and understand the parts of us that can still carry pain trauma or unmet needs instead of viewing these people as threats or enemies dick Schwarz encourages approaching these interactions as chances to bring compassion to our own inner system and to work toward healing the parts of ourselves that are activated in these exchanges let's take some time to

[00:30:41] contemplate if someone isn't treating you in the way that you want to be treated will you wait until the other person can recognize your core self before you acknowledge and recognize their core self if so how long will you wait and why Matt KH asks when someone isn't recognizing the Divine in you will you respond as the Divinity that you are I offer these questions to inspire you not to give you your reason to criticize yourself we are all on a path of Awakening and working towards as Matt Khan would say loving ourselves more not less eart toally invites us to have compassion for others when he says if I had lived her past in her pain

[00:31:47] if I had her level of Consciousness I would think and act exactly as she does this realization brings compassion forgiveness and peace peace toally suggests that when we judge others we fail to see their experience fully practicing compassion leads us to understand that their actions reflect their level of Consciousness just as ours do we're all in different grades in Earth School on the path of Awakening can you really get mad at a second grader for not knowing what the fifth grader knows Adia Shanti a spiritual teacher rooted in Zen Buddhism once said in the end spirituality is not about watching the breath it's about waking up from the dream of Separation the dream that I am different from you that's the real teaching when we judge others it reinforces the illusion of Separation

[00:32:50] Adia Shanti encourages self-inquiry to dissolve that illusion showing us that judgments stem from seeing ourselves as separate and unhealed healing is bringing love to all of our parts especially those that we're ashamed of every single version of us deserves love tenderness and Grace resistance to any part of yourself or others only deepens the division instead love is the answer to internal and external conflicts Matt KH says it very succinctly when he shares loving ourselves will always be of the highest importance as we evolve our Consciousness we become more loving there will never be anything more important than love he goes on to say your alignment with love is all that is required to ignite the light of your Highest Potential in every breath you're either moving Closer to Love or further from it choose love as often as possible

[00:33:56] especially toward yourself and watch the Miracles unfold love is the most fundamental and important aspect of Awakening Consciousness we embody our power when we know and live from our core self the core self loves all our parts and guides the parts to love themselves and all the other parts creating Inner Harmony and Alignment the most disempowered we can be on our spiritual path is not Ling oursel enough matius Stefano author modern Mystic and spiritual teacher explains that being anti something focuses energy on Resistance and Separation The more we focus on opposition or resistance the more we give power to what we are opposing this is why he emphasizes being for something instead of against something for example instead of being anti-war one can focus on promoting

[00:34:59] peace he highlights that true love doesn't resist or reject anything but instead seeks to understand accept and integrate love doesn't fight against Darkness it simply shines light which transforms and illuminates in this sense love is inclusive and expansive while opposition creates boundaries and reinforces separateness let's not forget that we are already love you are love I am love we are love we don't need to go looking for it somewhere else we have to remember that it is who we are in this podcast I provide you with the tools to work through the obstacles to love let's love ourselves on the path of Awakening as we go through the process of forgetting and then remembering who we truly are we're all Awakening into our true nature all at

[00:36:02] different stages and ages we're all in different grades here at Earth school as we wrap up this episode I'll leave you with this quote by Jimmy Hendricks when the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace at the end of this episode I invite you to think of one way you can love yourself more and how you can make it a priority if you'd like to listen to a guided meditation to support you in accessing your core self and inate love please check out episode 25 if you're interested in diving deeper into this work with a small group of like-minded people I'm offering three different spiritual exploration groups starting in March of 2025 one group will be for ifs practitioners another group will be for therapists and coaches who are not ifs practitioners but are interested in ifs and parts

[00:37:05] work and a third group for non-practitioners or clients of ifs those of you who have used this work for your own personal healing and growth if you're interested you can find more information on my website danielc caron.com [Music] thanks for listening to this podcast if you found this episode helpful please consider assisting me in reaching more people by sharing it with others or writing a review together let's raise our Consciousness to help evolve Humanity for more information please visit my website Daniel karen.com that's d n i e l l e c a r r o n.com [Music]
