Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="032f4b142947fe9083f3fe56cee99f220a1cef5469da1ff7b24e8c1504ff" Subject: =?UTF-8?q?How_to_show_up_in_any_room_with_a_low_heart_rate:_Silicon_Valle?= =?UTF-8?q?y=E2=80=99s_missing_etiquette_playbook_|_Sam_Lessin?= From: Lenny's Newsletter To: Hidden Recipient Date: Thu, 15 Jan 2026 13:32:15 +0000 X-Hiring: We are hiring, reach out at header-hacker@emailshot.io X-EmailShot-Signature: w1dMU9e7D7nnRSCgUcw64KQguTZtYJkuOJf0Bnn5m2vxlTT0fc6Y8dDOZXq_MD9--KAiixUBu5PhagqFjWY_Xw== --032f4b142947fe9083f3fe56cee99f220a1cef5469da1ff7b24e8c1504ff Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable View this post on the web at https://www.lennysnewsletter.com/p/silicon-val= leys-missing-etiquette-playbook Sam Lessin is a partner at Slow Ventures, a former VP of Product at Faceboo= k, and a two-time founder who=E2=80=99s now teaching etiquette to Silicon V= alley=E2=80=99s founders. In this unconventional episode, Sam explains why = proper etiquette has become a vital skill for founders in 2026=E2=80=94espe= cially as technology becomes more central to society and trust becomes hard= er to build. His etiquette book and courses have become surprisingly popula= r, teaching founders how to =E2=80=9Cshow up in a room with a low heart rat= e=E2=80=9D and quickly build trust. Listen on YouTube [ https://substack.com/redirect/ca1c8308-3612-41bd-a644-5= cb86cffde10?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0= l24U ], Spotify [ https://substack.com/redirect/56788b34-60bd-458f-aaa5-60b= 4f4612dd1?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l2= 4U ], and Apple Podcasts [ https://substack.com/redirect/a2660f69-ee0a-404c= -9a59-bc95e28681f1?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m= 0rbAsF0l24U ] We discuss: Why etiquette matters Sam=E2=80=99s framework for showing up confidently, with a low heart rate, = in any room How to navigate introductions, small talk, meetings, and meals like a pro Simple hacks for remembering names and handling awkward social situations 30+ specific etiquette tips Brought to you by: 10Web [ https://substack.com/redirect/3418e7ad-a507-410c-9ef1-3b6452c29b79?= j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ]=E2=80= =94Vibe-coding platform as an API DX [ https://substack.com/redirect/5fbff447-baf1-4624-8590-c4633379924c?j= =3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ]=E2=80= =94The developer intelligence platform designed by leading researchers WorkOS [ https://substack.com/redirect/49b4956c-2489-4808-b044-df87f29a31de= ?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ]=E2= =80=94Modern identity platform for B2B SaaS, free up to 1 million MAUs Where to find Sam Lessin: =E2=80=A2 X: https://x.com/lessin [ https://substack.com/redirect/a6bf153a-= c86b-4803-8eee-95db84cb56d1?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN4= 8_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wlessin [ https://substack.= com/redirect/ec1d0e1d-abec-4bec-a8fa-f70fc1461292?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.x= u76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Website: https://www.wlessin.com [ https://substack.com/redirect/= d5db2e3d-ee3a-44a7-8655-dac84548bcbd?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP= 822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Podcast: https://moreorlesspod.com [ https://substack.com/redirec= t/bea27286-e6fa-44fd-8dcc-6bbe1f329ed3?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArD= fP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Lettermeme: https://lettermeme.com/lessin [ https://substack.com/= redirect/bad0c21f-ba8e-4108-865e-2f912a41b1f1?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76u= FObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] Referenced: =E2=80=A2 Y Combinator: https://www.ycombinator.com [ https://substack.com/= redirect/5b65d1ed-d958-471a-a98d-8c38f71afa34?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76u= FObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Kleiner Perkins: https://www.kleinerperkins.com [ https://substac= k.com/redirect/eb3c1e76-ea0a-4572-8143-12a468dcf948?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0= =2Exu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 =E2=80=9CLose Yourself=E2=80=9D by Eminem on Spotify: https://ope= n.spotify.com/track/7MJQ9Nfxzh8LPZ9e9u68Fq [ https://substack.com/redirect/= af62276a-0f01-4ac3-8c6f-a0cb8ea57cab?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP= 822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Alison Gopnik on Childhood Learning, AI as a Cultural Technology,= and Rethinking Nature vs. Nurture: https://conversationswithtyler.com/epis= odes/alison-gopnik [ https://substack.com/redirect/1dc49d4e-e1c2-40b4-b427-= 20ab2352bd07?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF= 0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Garry Tan on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/garrytan [ htt= ps://substack.com/redirect/3e8b91f0-ab57-43a1-a725-05ccb9eb8561?j=3DeyJ1Ijo= iM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Bain & Company: https://www.bain.com [ https://substack.com/redir= ect/9188a2e3-2700-4d7c-a92b-443c13fc4ed6?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqA= rDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Evernote: https://evernote.com [ https://substack.com/redirect/64= 36e04e-6fc9-4840-895d-f0d43cc4a3b7?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP82= 2j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Calendly: https://calendly.com [ https://substack.com/redirect/a4= b6cca0-7107-48bd-964b-39dd5a07c1a5?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP82= 2j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Morning Brew: https://www.morningbrew.com [ https://substack.com/= redirect/99c2975d-cd79-48bf-b921-05b6f97885c8?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76u= FObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Cursor: https://cursor.com [ https://substack.com/redirect/8ee62b= a9-aa08-4793-bce3-fed3f247debc?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-j= nN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 The rise of Cursor: The $300M ARR AI tool that engineers can=E2= =80=99t stop using | Michael Truell (co-founder and CEO): https://www.lenny= snewsletter.com/p/the-rise-of-cursor-michael-truell [ https://substack.com/= redirect/19171e25-8ab6-4fd1-9ded-7df8a8ffd31c?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76u= FObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 DigitalOcean: https://www.digitalocean.com [ https://substack.com= /redirect/57e59a2a-31e2-4d94-a408-a3736ff273ab?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76= uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Cloudflare: https://www.cloudflare.com [ https://substack.com/red= irect/eb21a8b5-ecc9-48d7-8373-4c9aa134ee14?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFOb= qArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 SpaceX: https://www.spacex.com [ https://substack.com/redirect/27= b6c6c4-1707-4983-9f96-5fdcfe2a6dea?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP82= 2j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Marc Andreessen on X: https://x.com/pmarca [ https://substack.com= /redirect/09d70585-592d-45d9-b8bf-dc37a0e46799?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76= uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Landman on Prime Video: https://www.amazon.com/Landman-Season-1/d= p/B0D4D8RTMD [ https://substack.com/redirect/8024477d-5622-44c2-84e2-84d9de= 0cbb02?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U = ] =E2=80=A2 Dave Morin on X: https://x.com/davemorin [ https://substack.com/r= edirect/fd668cce-6a88-4d91-868b-241734824697?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uF= ObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] Recommended books: =E2=80=A2 Modern Etiquette in Technology, Finance, Society, and at Home: A = Slow Ventures Handbook: https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Etiquette-Technology-= Finance-Society-ebook/dp/B0G4HSKSY5 [ https://substack.com/redirect/f33079b= 7-8c02-42cd-b333-d4a231397b97?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jn= N48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Life, the Universe and Everything: https://www.amazon.com/Univers= e-Everything-Hitchhikers-Guide-Galaxy-ebook/dp/B001ODEQ7A [ https://substac= k.com/redirect/7ea09081-4e6b-490c-a311-220e44d7257b?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0= =2Exu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 The Ancient City: A Study on the Religion, Laws, and Institutions= of Greece and Rome: https://www.amazon.com/Ancient-City-Religion-Instituti= ons-Greece/dp/0801823048 [ https://substack.com/redirect/061433c0-3332-497b= -8e7e-5b70948e07f4?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m= 0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Man=E2=80=99s Search for Meaning: https://www.amazon.com/Mans-Sea= rch-Meaning-Viktor-Frankl-ebook/dp/B009U9S6FI [ https://substack.com/redire= ct/24be0826-a19f-4795-a9b0-f1a459559979?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqAr= DfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 Area 51: An Uncensored History of America=E2=80=99s Top Secret Mi= litary Base: https://www.amazon.com/Area-51-Uncensored-Americas-Military-eb= ook/dp/B004THU68Q [ https://substack.com/redirect/4a8baa6a-0c34-4677-b8d3-5= 011a4f38353?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0= l24U ] =E2=80=A2 The Lessons of History: https://www.amazon.com/Lessons-History-Wi= ll-Durant/dp/143914995X [ https://substack.com/redirect/2638e24b-8ffa-412e-= b605-597d9b8d4a94?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0= rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 The Fish That Ate the Whale: The Life and Times of America=E2=80= =99s Banana King: https://www.amazon.com/Fish-That-Ate-Whale-Americas/dp/12= 50033314 [ https://substack.com/redirect/140de59b-ffe0-4200-b978-c7c0ced514= b1?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ] =E2=80=A2 The Last Kings of Shanghai: The Rival Jewish Dynasties That Helpe= d Create Modern China: https://www.amazon.com/Last-Kings-Shanghai-Jewish-Dy= nasties/dp/0735224439 [ https://substack.com/redirect/538e384c-c125-450a-8d= 6a-0ebf2ef501e6?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObqArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rb= AsF0l24U ] Production and marketing by https://penname.co/ [ https://substack.com/redi= rect/1c3f8001-cc17-493f-bafc-4e4db7c08198?j=3DeyJ1IjoiM2dmeXZtIn0.xu76uFObq= ArDfP822j-jnN48_jCfgM3m0rbAsF0l24U ]. For inquiries about sponsoring the po= dcast, email podcast@lennyrachitsky.com [ mailto:podcast@lennyrachitsky.com= ]. Lenny may be an investor in the companies discussed. My biggest takeaways from this conversation:... Unsubscribe https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubGVubnl= zbmV3c2xldHRlci5jb20vYWN0aW9uL2Rpc2FibGVfZW1haWw_dG9rZW49ZXlKMWMyVnlYMmxrSW= pveU1Ea3dNVGMwTWpZc0luQnZjM1JmYVdRaU9qRTRNekF3TlRJNE5pd2lhV0YwSWpveE56WTROR= GcwTXpFNExDSmxlSEFpT2pFNE1EQXdNakF6TVRnc0ltbHpjeUk2SW5CMVlpMHhNRGcwTlNJc0lu= TjFZaUk2SW1ScGMyRmliR1ZmWlcxaGFXd2lmUS5ZSDd5b3ZGZXl5TnEzbktmNWo0cm00RGdoajZ= vRlBPSnJaSlg2QzNfVk53IiwicCI6MTgzMDA1Mjg2LCJzIjoxMDg0NSwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6Mj= A5MDE3NDI2LCJpYXQiOjE3Njg0ODQzMTgsImV4cCI6MjA4NDA2MDMxOCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiL= CJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.rAlAdAiKOJDqxwr0Hpf7-snrQqWPxMPKUNozQNRqg-8? --032f4b142947fe9083f3fe56cee99f220a1cef5469da1ff7b24e8c1504ff Content-Type: text/html; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable How to show up in any ro= om with a low heart rate: Silicon Valley’s missing etiquette playbook= | Sam Lessin3D""
How to build trust, lower your heart rate, and win in business by unde= rstanding proper etiquette
͏     ­͏   ̳= 9; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nb= sp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&= #847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nbs= p;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&#= 847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  = ;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= 47;     ­͏     ­͏     = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  =   ­͏     ­͏     ­T= 7;     ­͏     ­͏     &= #173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   =   ­͏     ­͏     ­͏= ;     ­͏     ­͏     &#= 173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   &= #8199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏=     ­͏     ­͏     = 73;͏     ­͏     ­͏   &#= 8199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ =     ­͏     ­͏     = 3;͏     ­͏     ­͏   = 199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &= nbsp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= ;͏     ­͏     ­͏   Q= 99; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &n= bsp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= ͏     ­͏     ­͏   ̳= 9; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nb= sp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&= #847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nbs= p;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&#= 847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  = ;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= 47;     ­͏     ­͏     = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  =   ­͏     ­͏     ­T= 7;     ­͏     ­͏     &= #173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   =   ­͏     ­͏     ­͏= ;     ­͏     ­͏     &#= 173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   &= #8199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏=     ­͏     ­͏     = 73;͏     ­͏     ­͏   &#= 8199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ =     ­͏     ­͏     = 3;͏     ­͏     ­͏   = 199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &= nbsp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= ;͏     ­͏     ­͏   Q= 99; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &n= bsp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= ͏     ­͏     ­͏   ̳= 9; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nb= sp;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&= #847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏ &nbs= p;   ­͏     ­͏     ­&#= 847;     ­͏     ­͏    = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  = ;   ­͏     ­͏     ­= 47;     ­͏     ­͏     = ­͏     ­͏     ­͏  =   ­͏     ­͏     ­T= 7;     ­͏     ­͏     &= #173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   =   ­͏     ­͏     ­͏= ;     ­͏     ­͏     &#= 173;͏     ­͏     ­͏   &= #8199; ­͏     ­͏     ­͏=     ­͏     ­͏     = 73;
<= /td>
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Lenny's Podca= st: Product | Ca…
How to show up in any room wi…=
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=3D""Listen now
 

How to sh= ow up in any room with a low heart rate: Silicon Valley’s missing eti= quette playbook | Sam Lessin

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= Sam Lessin is a partner at Slow Ventures, a former VP of Pro= duct at Facebook, and a two-time founder who’s now teaching etiquette= to Silicon Valley’s founders. In this unconventional episode, Sam ex= plains why proper etiquette has become a vital skill for founders in 2026&#= 8212;especially as technology becomes more central to society and trust bec= omes harder to build. His etiquette book and courses have become surprising= ly popular, teaching founders how to “show up in a room with a low he= art rate” and quickly build trust.

We discuss:

  1. Why etiquette matters

  2. Sam’s framework for showing up confidently, with a low = heart rate, in any room

  3. How to navigate intr= oductions, small talk, meetings, and meals like a pro

  4. Simple hacks for remembering names and handling awkward social si= tuations

  5. 30+ specific etiquette tips


Brought to you by:

10Web—V= ibe-coding platform as an API

DX= —The developer intelligence platform designed by leadi= ng researchers

WorkOS—Modern identity platform for B2B SaaS, free up to 1 million MAUs=

Where to find Sam L= essin:

• X: https://x.com/lessin

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wlessin

• Website: https://www.wlessin.com

• Podcast: https://moreorlesspod.com

•= Lettermeme: https://lettermeme.com/lessin

Referenced:

• Y Combinator: https://www.yc= ombinator.com

• Kleiner Perkins: https://www.k= leinerperkins.com

• “Lose Yourself= 221; by Eminem on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/trac= k/7MJQ9Nfxzh8LPZ9e9u68Fq

• Alison Gopnik on= Childhood Learning, AI as a Cultural Technology, and Rethinking Nature vs.= Nurture: https://conversationswithtyler.com/episodes/alison-gopnik

• Garry Tan on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gar= rytan

• Bain & Company: https://www.bain.= com

• Evernote: https://evernote.com

• Calendly: https://calendly.com

• Morning Brew: https://www.morningbrew.com

• Cursor: https://cursor.com

• The ris= e of Cursor: The $300M ARR AI tool that engineers can’t stop using | = Michael Truell (co-founder and CEO): https://www.lennysnewsletter.com/p/the-ri= se-of-cursor-michael-truell

• DigitalOcean:= ht= tps://www.digitalocean.com

• Cloudflare: https= ://www.cloudflare.com

• SpaceX: https://www.sp= acex.com

• Marc Andreessen on X: https://x.com= /pmarca

Landman on = Prime Video: https://www.amazon.com/Landman-Season-1/dp/B0D4D8RTMD

• Dave Morin on X: https://x.com/davemorin

Recommended books:

• = Modern Etiquette in Technology, Finance, Society, and at Home: A= Slow Ventures Handbook: https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Etiquette-Te= chnology-Finance-Society-ebook/dp/B0G4HSKSY5

R= 26; Life, the Universe and Everything: https://www.amazo= n.com/Universe-Everything-Hitchhikers-Guide-Galaxy-ebook/dp/B001ODEQ7A<= /p>

The Ancient City: A Study on the R= eligion, Laws, and Institutions of Greece and Rome: https://www.am= azon.com/Ancient-City-Religion-Institutions-Greece/dp/0801823048

Man’s Search for Meaning: = https://www.amazon.com/Mans-Search-Meaning-Viktor-Frankl-ebook/dp/B009U9S6F= I

Area 51: An Uncensored Histo= ry of America’s Top Secret Military Base: https://www.amazo= n.com/Area-51-Uncensored-Americas-Military-ebook/dp/B004THU68Q

The Lessons of History: = https://ww= w.amazon.com/Lessons-History-Will-Durant/dp/143914995X

= The Fish That Ate the Whale: The Life and Times of= America’s Banana King: https://www.amazon.com/Fish-That-Ate-= Whale-Americas/dp/1250033314

T= he Last Kings of Shanghai: The Rival Jewish Dynasties That Helped Create Mo= dern China: https://www.amazon.com/Last-Kings-Shanghai-Jewish-Dynas= ties/dp/0735224439


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