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Kid: “Papa, are you growing taller all the time?” |
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Kid: “Mamma, when the fire goes out where does it go?” |
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A high school girl, seated next to a famous astronomer at a dinner party, struck up a conversation with him by asking, “What do you do in life?” |
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Little Bobbie, while at a neighbor’s, was given a piece of bread and butter, and politely said “Thank you.” |
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Mother took Willie to his first concert. The conductor was leading the orchestra and directing the soprano soloist as well. Willie was greatly interested. |
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“Mother, can I have those apples on the sideboard?” |
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“Papa, what are ancestors?” |
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“What’s the matter with your wife? She looks all broken up.” |
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“How many cigars do you smoke a day?” |
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A guide, showing an old lady through the Zoo, took her to a cage occupied by a kangaroo. |
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“Papa, what is the person called who brings you in contact with the spirit world?” |
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“When are you going on your vacation?” |
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“Don’t you agree that ‘time’ is the greatest healer?” |
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“I dreamed last night that I had invented a new type of breakfast food and was sampling it when–” |
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Two kids talking:
“I painted something for last year’s academy.” |
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Friend 1: “Did you know that I had taken up story-writing as a career?” |
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“What do you find the most difficult thing on the piano?” |
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Two girls: |
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Waiter: “Yes, sir, we are very up to date. Everything here is cooked by electricity.” |
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Diner: “Waiter, the portions seem to have got a lot smaller lately.” |
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Teacher: “Tell me something about oysters, Johnny.” |