A FEW MORE LESSONS
I rose next with a of exhilaration, in of the already experienced; but I the of Mary Ann was no light matter, as her was to be with pomade, in three long tails, and with of ribbon: a my great in performing. She told me her nurse do it in the time, and, by up a of impatience, to me still longer. When all was done, we into the schoolroom, where I met my other pupil, and with the two till it was time to go to breakfast. That being concluded, and a having been with Mrs. Bloomfield, we repaired to the again, and the of the day. I my very backward, indeed; but Tom, though to every of exertion, was not without abilities. Mary Ann read a word, and was so careless and that I on with her at all. However, by of great and patience, I managed to something done in the of the morning, and then my out into the garden and grounds, for a little dinner. There we got along together, that I they had no of going with me: I must go with them, they to lead me. I must run, walk, or stand, as it their fancy. This, I thought, was the order of things; and I it disagreeable, as on this as well as occasions, they to the places and the most occupations. But there was no remedy; either I must them, or keep from them, and thus appear of my charge. To-day, they a particular to a well at the of the lawn, where they in with and for above an hour. I was in that their mother would see them from the window, and me for them thus to their and wet their and hands, of taking exercise; but no arguments, commands, or them away. If she did not see them, some one else did—a on had entered the gate and was up the road; at the of a from us he paused, and calling to the children in a tone, them "keep out of that water." "Miss Grey," said he, "(I it is Miss Grey), I am that you should allow them to dirty their in that manner! Don't you see how Miss Bloomfield has her frock? and that Master Bloomfield's are wet? and of them without gloves? Dear, dear! Let me that in you will keep them at least!" so saying, he away, and his up to the house. This was Mr. Bloomfield. I was that he should his children Master and Miss Bloomfield; and still more so, that he should speak so to me, their governess, and a perfect to himself. Presently the to us in. I with the children at one, while he and his lady took their at the same table. His there did not him in my estimation. He was a man of ordinary stature—rather than above—and thin than stout, thirty and years of age: he had a large mouth, pale, complexion, milky eyes, and the colour of a cord. There was a leg of mutton him: he helped Mrs. Bloomfield, the children, and me, me to cut up the children's meat; then, after about the mutton in directions, and it from different points, he it not fit to be eaten, and called for the cold beef.
"What is the with the mutton, my dear?" asked his mate.
"It is overdone. Don't you taste, Mrs. Bloomfield, that all the is out of it? And can't you see that all that nice, red is away?"
"Well, I think the will you."
The was set him, and he to carve, but with the most of discontent.
"What is the with the beef, Mr. Bloomfield? I'm sure I it was very nice."
"And so it was very nice. A joint not be; but it is spoiled," he, dolefully.
"How so?"
"How so! Why, don't you see how it is cut? Dear—dear! it is shocking!"
"They must have cut it in the kitchen, then, for I'm sure I it properly here, yesterday."
"No they cut it in the kitchen—the savages! Dear—dear! Did any one see such a piece of so ruined? But that, in future, when a dish this table, they shall not touch it in the kitchen. Remember that, Mrs. Bloomfield!"
Notwithstanding the of the beef, the managed to cut himself some slices, part of which he ate in silence. When he next spoke, it was, in a less tone, to ask what there was for dinner.
"Turkey and grouse," was the reply.
"And what besides?"
"Fish."
"What of fish?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know?" he, looking up from his plate, and his knife and in astonishment.
"No. I told the cook to some fish—I did not what."
"Well, that everything! A lady to keep house, and doesn't know what fish is for dinner! to order fish, and doesn't what!"
"Perhaps, Mr. Bloomfield, you will order dinner in future."
Nothing more was said; and I was very to out of the room with my pupils; for I so and in my life for anything that was not my own fault.
In the we to lessons again: then out again; then had tea in the schoolroom; then I Mary Ann for dessert; and when she and her had gone to the dining-room, I took the opportunity of a to my dear friends at home: but the children came up I had it. At seven I had to put Mary Ann to bed; then I played with Tom till eight, when he, too, went; and I my and my clothes, which I had no opportunity for doing, and, finally, to myself.
But this is a very of a day's proceedings.
My of and surveillance, of as my and I got to each other, more as their unfolded. The name of governess, I soon found, was a as to me: my had no more of than a wild, colt. The of their father's temper, and the of the he was to when irritated, them in his presence. The girls, too, had some of their mother's anger; and the boy might occasionally be to do as she him by the of reward; but I had no to offer; and as for punishments, I was to understand, the that to themselves; and yet they me to keep my in order. Other children might be by the of anger and the of approbation; but neither the one the other had any upon these.
Master Tom, not with to be ruled, must needs set up as a ruler, and a to keep, not only his sisters, but his in order, by manual and applications; and, as he was a tall, boy of his years, this no inconvenience. A boxes on the ear, on such occasions, might have settled the easily enough: but as, in that case, he might make up some to his mother which she would be sure to believe, as she had such in his veracity—though I had already it to be by no means unimpeachable—I to from him, in self-defence; and, in his most moods, my only was to him on his and his hands and till the was abated. To the of him from doing what he ought not, was added that of him to do what he ought. Often he would positively to learn, or to repeat his lessons, or to look at his book. Here, again, a good might have been serviceable; but, as my powers were so limited, I must make the best use of what I had.
As there were no settled hours for study and play, I to give my a task, which, with attention, they perform in a time; and till this was done, I was, or they might be, nothing of should me to them to the schoolroom, if I should with my chair against the door to keep them in. Patience, Firmness, and Perseverance were my only weapons; and these I to use to the utmost. I always to the and promises I made; and, to that end, I must be to and promise nothing that I not perform. Then, I would from all and of my own ill-temper: when they tolerably, I would be as and as it was in my power to be, in order to make the possible good and conduct; I would with them, too, in the and most manner. When I them, or to their wishes, after a fault, it should be more in than in anger: their little and prayers I would make plain and clear to their understanding; when they said their prayers at night and asked for their offences, I would them of the of the past day, solemnly, but in perfect kindness, to avoid a of opposition; should be said by the naughty, ones by the good; and every of I would to them, as much as possible, by discourse—apparently with no other object than their present in view.
By these means I in time to the children and to the of their parents; and also to my friends at home that I was not so wanting in skill and as they supposed. I the I had to with were great; but I (at least I believed) patience and overcome them; and night and I Divine to this end. But either the children were so incorrigible, the so unreasonable, or myself so in my views, or so unable to them out, that my best and most of no result than sport to the children, to their parents, and to myself.
The of was as for the as the mind. I had to after my to catch them, to or them to the table, and often to them there till the lesson was done. Tom I put into a corner, seating myself him in a chair, with a book which the little that must be said or read, he was released, in my hand. He was not to push me and the chair away, so he would his and into the most and contortions—laughable, no doubt, to an spectator, but not to me—and loud and outcries, to but without the of tears. I this was done for the purpose of me; and, therefore, I might with and irritation, I to all visible of molestation, and to with indifference, waiting till it should him to this pastime, and prepare for a in the garden, by his on the book and reading or the he was to say. Sometimes he was to do his badly; and I had to his hand to prevent him from or the paper. Frequently I that, if he did not do better, he should have another line: then he would to this line; and I, to save my word, had to to the of his upon the pen, and his hand up and down, till, in of his resistance, the line was in some completed.
Yet Tom was by no means the most of my pupils: sometimes, to my great joy, he would have the to see that his policy was to his tasks, and go out and himself till I and his sisters came to join him; which was not at all, for Mary Ann his example in this particular: she on the to any other amusement: she would like a weight; and when I, with great difficulty, had succeeded in her thence, I had still to her up with one arm, while with the other I the book from which she was to read or spell her lesson. As the weight of the big girl of six too for one arm to bear, I transferred it to the other; or, if were of the burden, I her into a corner, and told her she might come out when she should the use of her feet, and up: but she there like a till dinner or tea-time, when, as I not her of her meals, she must be liberated, and would come out with a of on her round, red face. Often she would to some particular word in her lesson; and now I the I have had in to her obstinacy. If I had passed it over as a of no consequence, it would have been for parties, than to overcome it as I did; but I it my to this in the bud: and so it was, if I have done it; and had my powers been less limited, I might have obedience; but, as it was, it was a trial of her and me, in which she came off victorious; and every victory to and her for a contest. In I argued, coaxed, entreated, threatened, scolded; in I her in from play, or, if to take her out, to play with her, or to speak or have anything to do with her; in I to set her the of doing as she was bid, and being loved, and in consequence, and the of in her perversity. Sometimes, when she would ask me to do something for her, I would answer, "Yes, I will, Mary Ann, if you will only say that word. Come! you'd say it at once, and have no more trouble about it."
"No."
"Then, of course, I can do nothing for you."
With me, at her age, or under, neglect and were the most of punishments; but on her they no impression. Sometimes, to the pitch, I would shake her by the shoulder, or her long hair, or put her in the corner; for which she me with loud, shrill, screams, that through my like a knife. She I this, and when she had her utmost, would look into my with an air of satisfaction, exclaiming, "Now, then! that's for you!" and then again and again, till I was to stop my ears. Often these would Mrs. Bloomfield up to what was the matter?
"Mary Ann is a girl, ma'am."
"But what are these screams?"
"She is in a passion."
"I such a noise! You might be killing her. Why is she not out with her brother?"
"I cannot her to her lessons."
"But Mary Ann must be a good girl, and her lessons." This was spoken to the child. "And I I shall such terrible again!"
And her cold, upon me with a look that not be mistaken, she would the door, and walk away. Sometimes I would try to take the little by surprise, and ask her the word while she was of something else; she would to say it, and then check herself, with a look that to say, "Ah! I'm too for you; you shan't it out of me, either."
On another occasion, I to the whole affair; and talked and played with her as usual, till night, when I put her to bed; then over her, while she all and good humour, just departing, I said, as and as "Now, Mary Ann, just tell me that word I you good-night. You are a good girl now, and, of course, you will say it."
"No, I won't."
"Then I can't you."
"Well, I don't care."
In I my sorrow; in I for some of contrition; she "didn't care," and I left her alone, and in darkness, most of all at this last proof of stubbornness. In my I not a more than for my mother to to me at night: the very idea was terrible. More than the idea I felt, for, happily, I a fault that was of such penalty; but once I remember, for some of my sister's, our mother proper to it upon her: what she felt, I cannot tell; but my and for her I shall not soon forget.
Another in Mary Ann was her to keep into the nursery, to play with her little sisters and the nurse. This was natural enough, but, as it was against her mother's desire, I, of course, her to do so, and did my to keep her with me; but that only her for the nursery, and the more I to keep her out of it, the she went, and the longer she stayed, to the great of Mrs. Bloomfield, who, I well knew, would all the of the to me. Another of my was the in the morning: at one time she would not be washed; at another she would not be dressed, unless she might wear some particular frock, that I her mother would not like her to have; at another she would and away if I to touch her hair. So that, frequently, when, after much trouble and toil, I had, at length, succeeded in her down, the was nearly over; and black looks from "mamma," and from "papa," spoken at me, if not to me, were sure to be my meed: for the so much as want of at times. Then, among the minor annoyances, was my to satisfy Mrs. Bloomfield with her daughter's dress; and the child's "was fit to be seen." Sometimes, as a powerful to me, she would perform the office of woman herself, and then complain of the trouble it gave her.
When little Fanny came into the schoolroom, I she would be mild and inoffensive, at least; but a days, if not a hours, to the illusion: I her a mischievous, little creature, up to and deception, as she was, and of her two of and defence: that of in the of those who her displeasure, and like a when her were not gratified. As she, generally, was in her parents' presence, and they were with the of her being a child, her were believed, and her loud them to and on my part; and when, at length, her to their eyes, I that the whole was to me.
"What a girl Fanny is getting!" Mrs. Bloomfield would say to her spouse. "Don't you observe, my dear, how she is since she entered the schoolroom? She will soon be as as the other two; and, I am sorry to say, they have of late."
"You may say that," was the answer. "I've been that same myself. I when we got them a they'd improve; but, of that, they and worse: I don't know how it is with their learning, but their habits, I know, make no of improvement; they rougher, and dirtier, and more every day."
I this was all pointed at me; and these, and all innuendoes, me more than any open would have done; for against the I should have been to speak in my own defence: now I it my plan to every impulse, every shrinking, and go on perseveringly, doing my best; for, as my was, I to it. I thought, if I on with and integrity, the children would in time more humanized: every month would to make them some little wiser, and, consequently, more manageable; for a child of nine or ten as and as these at six and seven would be a maniac.
I myself I was my and sister by my here; for small as the salary was, I still was earning something, and with economy I easily manage to have something to for them, if they would me by taking it. Then it was by my own will that I had got the place: I had all this on myself, and I was to it; nay, more than that, I did not the step I had taken. I to my friends that, now, I was to the charge, and able to myself to the end; and if I it to submit so quietly, or to so constantly, I would turn my home, and say myself—
They may crush, but they shall not me!
'Tis of that I think, not of them.
About Christmas I was allowed to visit home; but my was only of a fortnight's duration: "For," said Mrs. Bloomfield, "I thought, as you had your friends so lately, you would not for a longer stay." I left her to think so still: but she little how long, how those fourteen of had been to me; how I had for my holidays, how I was at their curtailment. Yet she was not to in this. I had told her my feelings, and she not be to them; I had not been with her a full term, and she was in not me a full vacation.
