14. “I can know and let go of a past hurt, but what is a good Buddhist to do when the hurt is direct and in your face? For example, repeated verbal abuse by my partner? Lovingkindness can only go so far.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Relinquishment] [Abuse/violence ] [Buddhist identity] [Harsh speech] [Relationships] [Goodwill] // [Buddha/Biography] [Vinaya] [Admonishment/feedback]
Ajahn Pasanno recounts the mistakes he made admonishing monks as a new abbot. [Ajahn Pasanno] [Abbot] [Fierce/direct teaching] [Right Speech]
Recollection: Ajahn Chah was the person with the most lovingkindness I ever met, but if somebody was out of line, they would know about it. [Ajahn Chah]
Story: Ajahn Chah admonishes a big Western monk. [Truth]
2. “Is it possible for an arahant to have seemingly negative thoughts or speech while free from defilement? In the Udana, Venerable Pilindavaccha gets complained about for calling monks outcastes or lowlings.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Arahant] [Unskillful qualities] [Great disciples] [Harsh speech]
Sutta: Ud 3.6: Pilindavaccha.
Quote: “Purity or impurity—you have to know for yourself.” — Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah]
Vinaya: Khandhaka 18.11.14 and Khandhaka 18.12.4: Students and teachers are mutually accountable. [Vinaya] [Mentoring]
14. Comment: This speaks to a Bodhisattva/Zen approach to karma. It’s more your attitude towards your karma. [Bodhisattva] [Zen] [Kamma] [Merit] [Tudong] [Harsh speech]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Impermanence]